Helping helpers

Hello, it's good to see you here in A Good Bible Study! Let's begin with prayer:

Lord, here we are again, wanting You, wanting to be closer to You and closer to who You created each of us to be. Help us to drop the worries and stressors for these few moments, so You can minister to our spirits and equip us for the day ahead.

We might be tired, we might feel so burdened with our responsibilities, we might have nothing to give right now but our willingness to be refreshed by Your Word. I know that I only need to show up, for with You, all things are possible. In Jesus' name, amen.

I first called this study Stress Inoculation, because it helps you reduce stress before it gets out of hand, kind of like vaccination shot. Gee, wouldn't that be nice if all we had to do was get a little shot once a year, and we could be inoculated against the effects of stress for another 12 months?!

Ahh, hectic schedules would sort themselves into orderly blocks of time; telemarketers would lose our numbers; and annoying interruptions would be a faint memory in the distant past.

Unfortunately, we're out of luck on that one. However, we can make a few small changes to the way we think about our lives and our relationships that, with practice, will make it seem like our load is much lighter.

For now, let's get God's take on stress. Read Isaiah 40:28-31 (New International Version)
     "Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
     Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; 31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

"Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength." Write that down somewhere for when you are ready to slap someone silly if they do that thing just one more time.

You know, I believe the people who experience the greatest level of stress are those who make it their job, or mission, to be helpers. A lot of people feel called to help others because of their upbringing.

When you experience trauma or harsh difficulties growing up, it seems to have one of two effects (and sometimes both at the same time): it creates a desire to protect yourself at all costs from financial, emotional, or physical insecurity; or it creates a desire to compassionately help others who are in the same situation that you survived.

Which one are you? Explain:
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I responded to my own upbringing with both a difficulty in trusting other people, and also a fierce desire to parent in a way that would give my children no doubt of my love, and in my vested interest in their well-being. I also became a Clinical Therapist, helping adults and children with some of the same problems that I witnessed and experienced growing up.

Some of you are probably helpers, as well. You may not work in a helping field, but you likely have a helping personality. The hardest thing for a helper to do, is learn when it is more helpful to not help, am I right?

The second hardest thing is to know that no matter how you try, some people just don't want to, or are not ready to, be helped. Some times it seems like we see failure after failure, and nothing we do makes any lasting difference.

What in your life seems like a failure? _________________________
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I want you to know that you are making a difference in ways that you might not see for years, if ever. The only way to cope with being a helper is to accept that, and help because you love people, even if you aren't getting the results you want all the time.

Winston Churchill said "Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm."

I want you to keep your passion and your enthusiasm for helping others, while you also help yourself by reducing stress. Helping others can, and ideally should, come from a joyful, energized spirit, but sometimes all we can do is pray we get through the day without doing more than 3 things we have to apologize for later. The only way to keep giving love out, with joy and longevity, is to fill up with something greater than you. Re-read the verse above.

Let's pray:

Dear heavenly Father, when I am tired and weary, You are not. When I am dry, You can fill me up with Living water. Give me Your strength for the day, Your power. When I stumble and fall, remind me that I can turn to You, and You will renew my strength again.You'll make me feel like I can soar on the wings of eagles, that I can run and never get weary, that I can walk and never get faint. I praise you, Lord Jesus Christ! In Your name, amen.

Love, Karen
 
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