As always, we will begin with prayer:
Father, I want to focus on being grateful for what is good right now, and for the good plans You have for each of us. Thank you for the fact that I can study Your Word online with friends I may never meet in person but can share a love for You and a desire to grow in You. Thank you for each friend reading these words with me! Bless them today, Lord. And thank you for everything good You are planning for each of us today. Help us to see every good thing in our lives, today and always. Let our prayer today be "Give me joy - Lord, I want it and I want You!" In the name of Jesus, amen.
Gratitude - it's the quickest way out of anger and pain and into peace.
Read Psalm 136
You know, I really hope you will take the time to look up each bible verse yourself. It's a privilege to have access to bibles in this country and there may come a day when it's not possible to openly read God's Word. Knowing for yourself what God says is powerful. Reading scripture activates that power in yourself. So, give that to yourself and never just take someone's word for what the bible says: look it up yourself and ask the Holy Spirit to give you discernment to recognize Truth from falsehood.
O.K., well done. Let's move on.
We've talked about the power of gratitude. Another way to quickly change your mood is to quit dwelling on what makes you so frustrated and instead talk it out. "If you share your pain, you cut it in half. If you don't, you double it." By the way, if you know the source of that quote, please let me know.
Now, I'm not saying go tell everyone you know what so and so did to you. I mean get ahold of a trusted friend and share what's making you so upset - with the goal of feeling better afterwards, not justified to keep on being angry.
We women are usually better at this because we like to share what's going on in our lives. That's one reason we tend to live longer than men.
I have to work at this because usually I won't talk to anyone else about what's going on until it's so bad I am ready to explode or throw in the towel. I do talk to God about it, but sometimes it helps to share your situation face to face with a trusted friend. That is key, because if you are thoughtful about who you share with, you are going to be more likely to seek counsel when it's a small dilemma and not a huge issue.
Now, I caution you not to just dump all over someone and leave them feeling blind-sided. Talk to someone with intention, not just to vent for the sake of releasing energy.
Read Proverbs 29:11
Think about who has your best interests at heart and ask if you can confide in them about your situation. Don't share your pain with someone who only listens for their own enjoyment, or who can't wait to tell you what they would do and what you should do.
And please keep it out of work, because either the person is going right into the next cubicle to spread a version of your truth around, or they are going to take your personal life into account the next time a professional decision needs to be made.
Talk to someone who is vested in your success, in helping your marriage, in supporting you as a parent and in your growth as a human being, not someone who is going to encourage you to make some rash, selfish decision. We can have a lot of friends, but they are not always going to give us wise counsel.
Read Proverbs 27:6.
It means a true friend can lovingly tell you the truth, even if it means telling you what you are doing is a mistake.
It's tempting for friends to just put a stamp of approval on whatever emotional decision we want to make. We want to confide in people who will listen, and then when we have been truly heard, help us get back to forgiveness and move forward.
Finally, talk to someone who gets you.
Read Amos 3:3.
Sometimes people just don't understand where you are coming from, or how your experience has shaped you. It's hard for everyone to relate to everyone else, at all times. So, confide in someone who won't get tripped up by their own response to what you have to say, but will still guide you to forgiveness and gratitude.
For example, my husband is one of the best people to talk to when I have a problem, unless he's the problem! It's funny, but true. We're like any other married couple, always learning to communicate.
I've learned though, to not expect him to remember anything I have to say if I am just sharing my day, going through my process of listing what I did, and what I wore, and what I think I'll make for dinner, you know the drill ladies.
I used to get frustrated with him saying back to me, "You never told me that," when I can tell you what time of day it was and what his facial expression was at the time, and how many times the dog barked while I said it. I recently had a little experience in his shoes that changed everything for me.
You see, I was driving with my husband when he mentioned the car seemed to be pulling to the right. It reminded me that our neighbor said the same thing when he towed the car out of the snow for me a few days before, then drove it to the garage. When I told my husband about it, he asked "Why did he think it was pulling?"
I said, "I don't know. All I heard was pulls to the right, blah, blah, blah, guy stuff about cars." My husband smiled and I had an epiphany right then and there. I said, "Hey, is that why after I tell you about my day and later you swear I didn't say a thing about something, it's because all you heard was "cooking, kids, dinner, blah, blah, blah my ears are bleeding, blah?" He looked at the road ahead and said, "Yup." Ahh, the moments of deep understanding between a man and a woman . . .
Now I let him know when I am just "getting out my words" and when I really need him to pay attention. The point is, not everyone is the best person to talk to about all things. So choose wisely.
Let's pray:
Lord, thank you for giving us friends. Please help us to be good judges of who, and when, to talk to about our problems. Help us come to You at all times, and in all circumstances, and to believe that You are working on it. In the name of Jesus, amen
Love, Karen
Photo by Aliaksandr Zabudzkohoto
No comments:
Post a Comment
Thank you for your comment.